Michelle Bachmann upon landing a position on the intelligence committee , plans a trip to the Far East Country of Manua. In order to brust up on their government she calls upon the wise sage of the Tea Party, Sarah Palin.
Palin: Alright, Michelle how can I help you?
Bachmann: Now look, I'm new on this committee. I’m doing my first state visit to a country called Manua. I need to know the names of the people that I’m going to see.
Do you know the guys' names?
Palin: Oh sure.
Bachmann: So you go ahead and tell me some of their names.
Palin: Well, I'll introduce you to the boys. You know sometimes nowadays they give diplomats peculiar names.
Palin: Now let's see. The Prime Minister is Hugh.
Bachmann: The Prime Minister is not me. I’m the Representative.
Palin: No me is the Secretary of Defense and I’m The Attorney General -
Bachmann: You can’t be the Attorney General
Palin: No Hugh is the Prime Minister.
Bachmann: Stop saying that I’m The Prime Minister.
Palin: I’m not the Prime Minister. I’m is the Attorney General.
Bachmann: How can you be the Attorney General of one country and running for President of another
Palin: You is not the Running for President, She is the Running for President.
Bachmann: She is the Running for President. I thought that You’re Running for President
Palin: No Your is the Secretary of Agriculture.
Bachmann: I’m not the Secretary of Agriculture and you lose my vote if you say I’m the Attorney General. Tell me the name of the U.N. Ambassador.
Palin: Tell me is the name of the Speaker of the House.
Bachmann: I don’t care about the Speaker of the House. I want to know the name of the U.N. Ambassador.
Palin: I want to know is the name of Minister of Finance.
Bachmann: I don’t care about the Minister of Finance. Do they have a U.S. Ambassador?
Palin: Of Course they have a U.S. Ambassador.
Bachmann: Does he have a name.
Palin: Of course.
Bachmann: Tell me his name?
Palin: Of course.
Bachmann: OK Tell me his name.
Palin: Of Course.
Bachmann: You going to tell me?.
Palin: I’m telling you, Of course.
Bachmann: So tell me.
Palin: She’s the head of Homeland Security - now we're not talkin' 'bout him.
Bachmann: Now, how did I get on Homeland Security?
Palin: You mentioned his name!
Bachmann: If I mentioned the Homeland Security's name, tell me what I said?
Palin: Oh he’s the Opposition Party.
Bachmann: Never mind the Opposition Party.
Palin: No - Never Mind’s been executed.
Bachmann: Huh?
Palin: No, Huh’s OK, he was acquitted
Bachmann: Well, I'm a war time Representative
Palin: I know that.
Bachmann: Now suppose that we decide to attack Manua. After a few weeks of heavy bombing they surrender.
Palin: Yes.
Bachmann: We negotiate a settlement with Hugh.
Palin: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
Bachmann: I don't even know what I'm talkin' about!
Palin: Well, that's all you have to do.
Bachmann: Hugh resigns.
Palin: Yes.
Bachmann: Now we’re dealing with She.
Palin: Maybe
Bachmann: So we’re negotiating with She.
Palin: Maybe!
Bachmann: Maybe?
Palin: Maybe
Bachmann: So we’re negotiating with Maybe.
Palin: NO, NO, NO! You’re negotiating with She.
Bachmann: Maybe.
Palin: That's right. There we go.
Bachmann: She then resigns. They ask me to deal with I’m. I’m not dealing with I’m.To Hell with them!
Palin: What was that?
Bachmann: To Hell With Them!
Palin: That’s the Chief Justice
Friday, December 17, 2010
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