Friday, December 17, 2010

Bachmann's first state visit

Michelle Bachmann upon landing a position on the intelligence committee , plans a trip to the Far East Country of Manua. In order to brust up on their government she calls upon the wise sage of the Tea Party, Sarah Palin.

Palin: Alright, Michelle how can I help you?

Bachmann: Now look, I'm new on this committee. I’m doing my first state visit to a country called Manua. I need to know the names of the people that I’m going to see.
Do you know the guys' names?

Palin: Oh sure.

Bachmann: So you go ahead and tell me some of their names.

Palin: Well, I'll introduce you to the boys. You know sometimes nowadays they give diplomats peculiar names.

Palin: Now let's see. The Prime Minister is Hugh.

Bachmann: The Prime Minister is not me. I’m the Representative.

Palin: No me is the Secretary of Defense and I’m The Attorney General -

Bachmann: You can’t be the Attorney General

Palin: No Hugh is the Prime Minister.

Bachmann: Stop saying that I’m The Prime Minister.

Palin: I’m not the Prime Minister. I’m is the Attorney General.

Bachmann: How can you be the Attorney General of one country and running for President of another

Palin: You is not the Running for President, She is the Running for President.

Bachmann: She is the Running for President. I thought that You’re Running for President

Palin: No Your is the Secretary of Agriculture.

Bachmann: I’m not the Secretary of Agriculture and you lose my vote if you say I’m the Attorney General. Tell me the name of the U.N. Ambassador.

Palin: Tell me is the name of the Speaker of the House.

Bachmann: I don’t care about the Speaker of the House. I want to know the name of the U.N. Ambassador.

Palin: I want to know is the name of Minister of Finance.

Bachmann: I don’t care about the Minister of Finance. Do they have a U.S. Ambassador?

Palin: Of Course they have a U.S. Ambassador.

Bachmann: Does he have a name.

Palin: Of course.

Bachmann: Tell me his name?

Palin: Of course.

Bachmann: OK Tell me his name.

Palin: Of Course.

Bachmann: You going to tell me?.

Palin: I’m telling you, Of course.

Bachmann: So tell me.

Palin: She’s the head of Homeland Security - now we're not talkin' 'bout him.

Bachmann: Now, how did I get on Homeland Security?

Palin: You mentioned his name!

Bachmann: If I mentioned the Homeland Security's name, tell me what I said?

Palin: Oh he’s the Opposition Party.

Bachmann: Never mind the Opposition Party.

Palin: No - Never Mind’s been executed.

Bachmann: Huh?

Palin: No, Huh’s OK, he was acquitted

Bachmann: Well, I'm a war time Representative

Palin: I know that.

Bachmann: Now suppose that we decide to attack Manua. After a few weeks of heavy bombing they surrender.

Palin: Yes.

Bachmann: We negotiate a settlement with Hugh.

Palin: Now that's the first thing you've said right.

Bachmann: I don't even know what I'm talkin' about!

Palin: Well, that's all you have to do.

Bachmann: Hugh resigns.

Palin: Yes.

Bachmann: Now we’re dealing with She.

Palin: Maybe

Bachmann: So we’re negotiating with She.

Palin: Maybe!

Bachmann: Maybe?

Palin: Maybe

Bachmann: So we’re negotiating with Maybe.

Palin: NO, NO, NO! You’re negotiating with She.

Bachmann: Maybe.

Palin: That's right. There we go.

Bachmann: She then resigns. They ask me to deal with I’m. I’m not dealing with I’m.To Hell with them!

Palin: What was that?

Bachmann: To Hell With Them!


Palin: That’s the Chief Justice

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