Tea Party Story Part 1

It started as Romeo and Juliet.

Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim made it into West Side Story.

The Republicans are trying to make it into Tea Party Story.

Here is Part 1.

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LIMBAUGH: (Spoken) Against the Dems we need every man we got.

BECK: (Spoken) The Tea Partier ain’t one of us.

LIMBAUGH: Cut it, Beck boy. I and Tea Partier are the leaders of the Reps.

BECK: Well, he acts like he don't wanna belong.

COULTER: Who wouldn't wanna belong to the Reps!

BECK: Tea Partier don't vote with us all the time.

HANNITY: What about the day we clobbered Medicaid?

O’REILLY: Which we couldn't have done without Tea Partier.

COULTER: He saved my ever-lovin' neck!

LIMBAUGH: Right! He's always come through for us and he will now.

(sings)
When you're a Rep,
You're a Rep all the way
From your first talk with God
Til the Feds take you away.

When you're a Rep,
If you’re caught in the can,
waiving hands all around,
We’ll run fast as we can!
The rich are never alone,
The Dems are feeling disconnected!
The White House is our home:
Congress should be disinfected,
Our money’s protected!

The Congress is ours
With a capital R,
You can keep your Ivory Towers
We’ve lowered the Bar.
You can keep your big Cars,
We are Political Stars!
(Spoken) I know Tea Partier like I know me. I guarantee you can count him in.

BECK: In, out, let's get crackin'.

O’REILLY: Where you gonna find Olberrmann?

LIMBAUGH: He’s on the Mall at the rally.

PALIN: But the District always goed Blue
LIMBAUGH: (innocently) I'm gonna make nice there! I'm only gonna challenge him.

O’REILLY: Great, Daddy-O!

LIMBAUGH: So everybody dress up sweet and sharp.

ALL (sing)
Oh, when the Reps go to a Place that is Blue,
We'll act like patriots through and through!
Hannity and Limbaugh will perpetuate our lies,
The Dems won’t explore, they’ll just ignore our unethical ties!

LIMBAUGH: (Spoken) Hey. Cool. Easy. Sweet. Meet Tea Partier and me at ten. And walk tall!

O’REILLY: We always walk tall!

COULTER: We're Reps!

BECK: The greatest!

BECK and COULTER (sing)
When you're a Rep,
You can own a gas guzzler,
Call the Dems, the damn elitists
How we fool them is a puzzler!

O’REILLY, BECK, PALIN
When you're a Rep,
You're the richest of men:
Little cash, your excluded;
Why earn one Mil, When there’s Ten!

ALL
The Reps create fear,
Our Swift Boats are connected!
The Dems'll will lose this year
'Cause no Liberal’s gonna get elected!
We’re well protected!
Here come the Reps
We’ll fix this election,
We’ve done it before,
They’ll never make the connection!

Here come the Reps:
Social programs we detest!
The rich get taxes cut,
Who cares about the rest!

We'll reclaim the House,
For Coulter and O’Reilly!
We'll control who’ll be your spouse,
We’ll win it oh so slyly.
And we ain't kiddin'!

Here come the Reps,
Yeah! We’ll continue what we’ve started!
Ev'ry Dem is going to lose
This is not for the Fainthearted!